Can we talk horror movies for a moment? The first scary movie I remember seeing is the original Halloween. It was the TV version, so no explicit violence or tits, and it still scared the pants off of me. A later unedited viewing revealed that it doesn't actually have much explicit violence, which truly makes it scarier--not knowing exactly what happened means that your imagination runs wild. Plenty of boobs, though.
I caught part of the 2007 remake of Halloween a couple of days ago, again a TV edited viewing experience. It was...an hour or so of my life I can't get back. There were some fun homages to the original film, but all in all it was the same movie with less character development and suspense, more tits, and much much more gore. Le sigh. I don't want to start in on a 'these kids today' kind of rant, but the only thing that kept me engaged at all was a sweater nouveau-Laurie Strode was sporting:
No, not the Queen of Sheba outfit, the navy sweater with the big white flowers. It was appealingly kitschy and cozy looking. I pondered whether it would be worth trying to knit, but the embarrassment of the inspiration source might be too much to bear. When Michael Myers ripped it off during a by-the-numbers chase scene, I gave up and changed the channel.
Short story long, I'm disappointed that practically every 'scary' movie just ends up being kind of gross. Guts =/= suspense. So I was dubious when Netflix recommended El Orfanato (The Orphanage) as a scary movie I would like. A foreign film. "What do you take me for, Netflix??" But I gave it a shot, seeing as how watching a flick with subtitles would boost my hipster cred. And then I sat on the edge of the couch for the next two hours with my mouth hanging half open. It was an actual story, with real characters, and suspense. Perfect Halloween scares, in the sense that they were from tension and apprehension instead of from disgusting/disturbing/torture-porn-esque shit going on. Netflix--I should not doubt thee. Let's never fight again.